Wow, what a week!

Strippers all over Mecklenburg County broke down in tears upon hearing that the Carolina Panthers were for sale. Let us have a moment of silence for the women and the wealthy men they love.

And here we go….

The Big Cat Declawed
Panthers owner Jerry Richardson decided to call it a day. Allegations that he sexually harassed women and used racial slurs have brought his rule to an end. If you are surprised that a rich, white Southern male used racial slurs, then you must be from Uzbekistan. The fact that employees called him “Mister” should have been a clue. Danny Glover’s character in “The Color Purple” was named Mister. You remember how that worked out!

The NFL Remix
Sean Combs made waves when he said he wanted to buy the team. Puff Daddy mentioned bringing Colin Kaepernick in to compete against Cam Newton. And Kaepernick wants to join P. Diddy on his management team. The thought of a hip-hop mogul (fact) and a black revolutionary (fiction) caused the wheels of progress to turn faster than an I-77 car crash. A local group (wealthy people not yet named) has formed and will be ready to enter the ownership race. How did a local group form so fast when Richardson just made the announcement Sunday night? Mmmmmm.

Hands-on Manager
Tavis Smiley was working hard on the job. Working hard at getting those digits! Smiley was confused about why he was suspended from PBS because he only “engaged in consensual workplace relationships.” The women who accused him of sexual misconduct have a different story. It probably didn’t help that the women involved were his employees. I can only imagine how he does a performance review. With all these “relationships,” how did he have time to host a show, do speaking engagements and criticize Obama?

The French Connection
France announced the first class of President’s Emmanuel Macron’s Make Our Planet Great Again. It’s a program where climate scientists receive grants to work on projects to help the environment. Some American scientists received grants and will join the international group of 18 scientists. The Americans are wasting their time in the states, so they should go overseas. The Trump Administration thinks climate change is a Chinese hoax. Meanwhile, China is attempting to cut down on its gas emissions. I wonder if that’s called an American hoax in China?

Bye Bye, Papa
Papa John’s founder and CEO John Schnatter is stepping down from the company. People became tired of hearing his political views that skewed to the right. What does employee health insurance have to do with the number of mushrooms on my pizza? If they work for you, make sure they are eligible for insurance (Duh?). If you don’t want to insure people, get robots to make your pizzas. And we were tired of you complaining about people not standing for the anthem. We just want to eat your doughy pizza and 10-inch cheese sticks. Your company model is based on people putting food on top of yeast dough and cooking it in an oven. I could do the same thing at home if I had a high-power/high-speed oven. With the massive list of pizza places to choose from, I’ve moved on.