President Obama turns 48 today.

So what does one give a brother who’s chauffeured around in a bulletproof limo and flies the globe aboard Air Force One?

The editors at offer five gift ideas. Feel free to add your own.

1. Ten minutes alone in the White House basement with Lou Dobbs.
2. Fifty-five million copies of his birth certificate; one for every registered Republican.
3. The freedom to say, publicly, “B–ch, Please” when Congress starts talking nonsense. (with grateful acknowledgements to
4. A trip to Five Guys – no cameras allowed, no security detail, no gawking fans; just him, Michelle and the girls.
5. See gift idea No. 1, but add the name Glenn Beck.

Happy Birthday, Mr. President.

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